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Ho No No

“Are you going home for the holidays?”

Many people see this as an innocuous bit of chit-chat at this time of year. Sadly, for some of us this question can cause panic, sweaty palms and in some rare cases, eye-rolling accompanied by copious amounts of stress eating.

The reality is that many of us, for whatever reason, will not be at home for the holidays. Some of us are not able to go home because we are not welcome. Others have to work, and others may simply not be able to afford to travel to their far-flung families. For these people, and everyone else who may not be “going home” during the holidays, I am here to give you hugs, alcoholic beverages, some advice, and lots of pithy comments regarding tacky holiday decorations.

The first time you are alone for the holidays can be rough. Constantly inundated by ads, movies, friends, etc… talking about their plans, their busy hustle and bustle, can be annoying to the point of inebriation. Holiday fatigue and depression are very real and serious things, and the most wonderful time of the year can quickly become the most dreadful time of the year.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I am completely ridiculous about Christmas. I have two Christmas trees at my house, copious amounts of winter tableaus involving woodland animals, ribbons, bunting, poinsettias, and I even put my cat in an outfit. Trust me, I am fully aware that I am full on homo when it comes to the decorating, and sending cards, and having pine scented candles. I own this, what can I say? I like sparkly things.

I am here to tell you that, despite all the bluster, the mess, the drunk people, the horribly tacky lights, Christmas is just a day.


That’s right y’all. It’s just a day. It’s a pagan celebration appropriated by the Christians that has become a capitalist dream. Bah humbug, right?

So, when you see the latest commercial with people arriving at the door of a perfect suburban house full of people slugging back eggnog and gathered around the fire and you feel some kind of way about it, remember it is just a day. It’s a day that will be over almost as quickly as it begins, and soon we will be moving on to the most ridiculous amateur drinking night of the year, New Year’s Eve.

So, as we navigate this most Jolly time of the year, be good to yourself. If that means telling people to back the hell off, then tell them to back the hell off. If that means you binge horrid movies on Netflix while eating bonbons and hanging out with your cat (I highly recommend this one) then make sure you get the fancy bonbons.

Happy Holidays from your one and only, and be sure to look for me at the movies on Christmas- I’ll be in the back row with a tub of popcorn, and probably crying (even though I am watching Star Wars)

Hugs and Tough Love,


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